IJMC Enhance Your Vocabulary

                   IJMC - Enhance Your Vocabulary

I am sometimes scared by the resources required to fix something after it 
has broken. However, I am also finding out that the resources required to 
do something right are often even more formidable. Right now, I know that 
I have four computers sitting in a laboratory situation to track down and 
verify that changes are having the desired effect before they're fully 
implemented. I'm remembering it only took three systems to find the 
problems in the first place. So yes, we're having fun now.          -dave




The Washington Post's "Style Invitational" asks readers to take any word
from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one
letter, and supply a new definition. Here are some recent winners from the
1998 submissions: 

Foreploy: any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
obtaining sex. 

Fortissimoe: the musical moment produced when someone serially slaps the
faces of the first-violin section. 

Tatyr: a lecherous Mr. Potato Head. 

Doltergeist: a spirit that decides to haunt someplace stupid, such as your
septic tank. 

Giraffiti: vandalism spray-painted very, very high, such as the famous
"Surrender Dorothy" on the Beltway overpass. 

Sarchasm: the gulf between the author of ironic wit and the recipient who
doesn't get it. 

Conratemps: the resentment permanent workers feel toward the fill-in
workers. 

Whitetater: a political hot potato. 

Reintarnation: coming back to life as a hillbilly. 

DIOS: the one true operating system. 

Inoculatte: to take coffee intravenously when you are running late. 

Hipatitis: terminal coolness. 

Writer's tramp: a woman who practices poetic licentiousness. 

Taterfamilias: the head of the Potato Head family. 

Guillozine: a periodical for executioners. 

Osteopornosis: a degenerate disease. 

Adulatery: cheating on your wife with a much younger woman who holds you
in awe. 

Suckotash: a dish consisting of corn, lima beans, and tofu. 

Emasculathe: a tool for castration. 

Burglesque: a poorly planned break-in. (See: Watergate)

Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad
vibes? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like a serious bummer? 

Glibido: all talk and no action. 

Antifun gal: a prude. 

Vaseball: a game of catch played by children in the living room. 

Eunouch: the pain of castration. 

Hindkerchief: really expensive toilet paper; toilet paper at Buckingham
palace. 

Deifenestration: to throw all talk of God out the window. 

Hozone: the area around 6th street. 

Acme: a generic skin disease. 

Dopeler effect: the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly. 

Hindprint: indentation made by a couch potato. 

Intaxication: euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until
you realize it was your money to start with. 

Newtspaper: the Washington Times. 

Nazigator: an overbearing member of your carpool. 




IJMC June 1999 Archives