IJMC - Mr. Right Rejection Letter: Wrestling Fan

In case your Valentine's Day plans end up a little off, here is yet 
another Rejection Letter all ready to be printed and handed over to the 
offending gentleman. Although I must admit, if you needed this one, and 
you did not find the Valentine's Day you expected, perhaps you should 
look at your own expectations first?                              -dave






Mr. Right Rejection Letter Form number 2 The Wrestling Fan

Dear (___rejectee's name here____)

I regret to inform you that you have been eliminated from further
contention as my Mr. Right. 

As you are probably aware, the competition 'was exceedingly tough and
dozens of well-qualified candidates such as yourself also failed to make
the final cut. I will, however, keep your name on file should an opening
become available. So that you may find better success in your future
romantic endeavors, please allow me to offer the following reason(s) you
were disqualified from the competition: 

[Check all those that apply]

 ___ Your wrestling outfits won't fit in the closet.

 ___ Your lingerie clashes with mine.

 ___ The fact that our finest dining experience was at Jaba the Pizza
     Hut had an adverse affect on me.

 ___ The fact that your idea of good sex involves blood and landing on your
     head is not a turn on

 ___ You failed the 20 Question Rule, i.e., I asked you 20 questions
     about yourself and all you did was talk about Stone Cold's next big
     fight.

 ___ Your pretty wrestling costumes clash with my clothes.

 ___ Your "Putting on a few, aren't you Stone?" comment was
     inappropriate.

 ___ You have almost no money, and that which you have you refuse to
     spend, because you "have to save for that Pay-Per View bash"

 ___ I find your inability to fix anything rather unattractive.

 ___ The fact that your bedroom is a regulation boxing ring, complete with
     chain-link fence.

 ___ The phrase "Austin 3-16" pops up to often

 ___ Your claim your ex-girlfriend was a female wrastler.

 ___ Two final words "Wrastlin's fake"   (and I am a southerner, and so 
     were my orgasms)


        Sincerely,

     [Your name here]