IJMC - A Brief Deluge of History

This one simply scares me. You have to wonder how the author picked 
various events...was it for their epic significance or simply because 
they sounded good when shortened? The universe may never know.  -dave








The History of the Universe in 200 Words or Less 
(By: Eric Schulman, Annals of Improbable Research ) 
  
Quantum fluctuation. 
Inflation. 
Expansion. 
Strong nuclear interaction. 
Particle-antiparticle annihilation. 
Deuterium and helium production. 
Density perturbations. 
Recombination. 
Blackbody radiation. 
Local contraction. 
Cluster formation. 
Reionization? 
Violent relaxation. 
Virialization. 
Biased galaxy formation? 
Turbulent fragmentation. 
Contraction. 
Ionization. 
Compression. 
Massive star formation. 
Deuterium ignition. 
Hydrogen fusion. 
Hydrogen depletion. 
Core contraction. 
Envelope expansion. 
Helium fusion. 
Carbon, oxygen, and silicon fusion. 
Iron production. 
Implosion. 
Supernova explosion. 
Metals injection. 
Star formation. 
Supernova explosions. 
Star formation. 
Condensation. 
Planetesimal accretion. 
Planetary differentiation. 
Crust solidification. 
Gas expulsion. 
Water condensation. 
Water dissociation. 
Ozone production. 
Ultraviolet absorption. 
Unicellular organisms. 
Mutation. 
Evolution. 
Respiration. 
Cell differentiation. 
Sexual reproduction. 
Fossilization. 
Land Exploration. 
Dinosaur extinction. 
Mammal expansion. 
Glaciation. 
Homo sapiens! 
Animal domestication. 
Food surplus production. 
Civilization! 
Innovation. 
Religion. 
Warring nations. 
Empire creation and destruction. 
Exploration. 
Colonization. 
Taxation without representation. 
Revolution. 
Constitution. 
Election. 
Expansion. 
Industrialization. 
Rebellion. 
Emancipation Proclamation. 
Invention. 
Mass production. 
Urbanization. 
Immigration. 
World conflagration. 
League of Nations. 
Suffrage extension. 
Depression. 
World conflagration! 
Fission explosions. 
United Nations. 
Space exploration. 
Assassinations. 
Lunar excursions. 
Resignation. 
Computerization. 
World Trade Organization. 
Terrorism. 
Internet Expansion. 
Reunification. 
Dissolution. 
World-Wide Web creation. 
Extrapolation? 
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